


We Are Broken

by bravest_person_in_Wonderland



Category: Newsies, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: Albert DaSilva is a Very Good Friend, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Crack Treated Seriously, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, I'm Sorry, Jack Kelly Is A Good Big Brother, Night Terrors, Platonic Male/Male Relationships, Platonic Relationships, apparently I can't write anything without Smalls acting like a cat, but only on the subject of a name, so is crutchie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 09:07:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28615554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bravest_person_in_Wonderland/pseuds/bravest_person_in_Wonderland
Summary: Race, now sitting up, gave a strangled whimper and reached out again, and Jack pulled him into his arms. Race's fists clenched his shirt and he could feel tears on the crook of his neck where his face was buried. He felt his whole frame shaking with silent sobs and held him even tighter, whispering reassurances into his hair, thumb stroking his back.
Relationships: Albert DaSilva & Racetrack Higgins, Crutchie & Jack Kelly, Racetrack Higgins & Jack Kelly
Comments: 4
Kudos: 22





	We Are Broken

**Author's Note:**

> first fic of 2021!!!
> 
> Warnings: night terrors (only seen from an outside perspective), vague references to probable past trauma... figured I'd put this just to be safe even though I don't actually go into detail on anything.

Nightmares were a standard in the lodging house. They all had them, for whatever reasons. If someone woke up with bloodshot eyes and shaky hands, the rest didn't mention it. The unspoken rule was that if someone needed to talk, they could bring it up themselves. No digging. It only caused more problems. 

It wasn't nightmares or insomnia keeping Jack up, more that he simply couldn't switch his mind off. He was wide awake with a world to himself in the inky darkness and the recesses of his imagination. He could hear the soft huffs of Crutchie's breathing nearby and smiled to himself at the peacefulness of it. A few stars peeked through the smog, tracing pictures in the sky. 

A noise from below pulled Jack out of his reverie, right as he was starting to get a bit prickly under his eyelids. 

"Jack," a voice hissed. "Jack!" The voice belonged to Albert, whose orange-haired head popped up over the top of the ladder. Even in the darkness Jack could make out a tinge of worry in his face. 

"Yeah?" He responded, propping himself up on an elbow and shooting a glance at Crutchie, who stirred a little but didn't fully wake. 

"Can ya come down? It's Race-" 

"He alright?" 

"I don't know. I never seen 'im like this before." 

Jack was on his way down the ladder after Al almost before the other boy had finished speaking. It was dim in the room, just the faint light of the moon filtering through the smog to give light. Everyone was awake excepting Race, who Jack instantly realized was trapped in the hold of a nightmare. He'd been in that position more than he liked to admit, woken up to Crutchie's voice and hands shaking him awake and trying to comfort him. It was always hard to wake up from something like that. 

"Race, hey," Jack muttered, dropping to his knees beside the bed. This was the exact reason Race slept on a bottom bunk. He hadn't had a bad one in years now, but when he'd first arrived he had twisted and wiggled so much nightly, even without dreams bothering him, that he would have fallen off the top and hurt himself. "Racer." 

Tentatively, worried the action would make this worse, Jack reached out a hand and touched Race's shoulder. His concern proved valid, because Race jerked away, his eyes still tightly shut, and thrashed even more. He gave a strangled sound and Jack saw out of the corner of his eye that Albert's hand clenched instinctively in a nervous tic. 

In his fitful sleep, Race drew his arms tightly around himself and rolled to his side, which considering his proximity to the edge of the small bed, dropped him almost directly in Jack's lap. Well, maybe the initial touch hadn't helped things, but at this point Jack didn't care. Race's fingernails were digging into his own arms and Jack knew that he had the ability to hurt himself in this state. He tried to pull Race's hands into his own, but the other boy fought back. 

Jack didn't know a lot about Race's past. He didn't know what he meant or thought he meant by the incoherent strings of words that spilled out as he fought against Jack's grip, but he did know one thing that had always gotten Race to listen to him, no matter what. 

"Race," he said one more time, glancing around to see who was nearest him. Albert, obviously, stood as if on guard, and Smalls had crept ever-catlike to watch concernedly. The rest were gathered around the room, fearfully hushed. Jack wanted to swear but didn't simply because he didn't think it was worth the few seconds. "Smalls, get over here and pin 'im," he muttered, tightly grasping Race's wrists. 

She obeyed, apparently coming to the same conclusion Jack had about Race's potential to hurt himself. True to her name, she was small enough that she could easily straddle Race's chest and hold him down while still making sure he was able to breathe properly. She pushed down on his shoulders with a worried crinkle between her eyebrows as Jack moved to Race's head and brushed blond curls out of his face. 

"Racer- _Antonio."_

Race stilled at the sound of his real name and Jack took it as an encouragement. Gently, he cupped a hand around the boy's cheek, hating that it was wet with tears, and said it again. 

"Antonio," he muttered, "Antonio Rose Higgins, you listenin' to me?" 

Smalls shot him a _what the-?_ look but stayed silent as Race fully quieted, his eyes slowly opening. 

"Jack... Jack?" His voice was small, even higher than normal, and Jack's heart twisted at how young he looked and sounded, his bright blue eyes red-rimmed. He moved to reach out a hand to Jack and Smalls let her weight off his shoulders, pushing herself off of his chest to sit on the floor nearby. 

"Yeah, I gotcha," Jack whispered because he knew that if he tried to really speak, his voice would probably crack. Geez, he hated seeing his kids like this. "I gotcha, Racer." 

Race, now sitting up, gave a strangled whimper and reached out again, and Jack pulled him into his arms. Race's fists clenched his shirt and he could feel tears on the crook of his neck where his face was buried. He felt his whole frame shaking with silent sobs and held him even tighter, whispering reassurances into his hair, thumb stroking his back. 

After a minute, Race's sobs ended and he sniffed, still curled tightly around Jack. 

"I don't wanna talk about it," he whispered before Jack could think of anything to say. "I don't wanna." 

"I'm not gonna make ya," Jack promised. "Ya ok?" 

Race shook his head against Jack's shoulder, then hesitated. He nodded. He shrugged, a second later, finally lifting his head from the crook of Jack's neck. 

"Maybe," he mumbled, sniffing again. 

Instinctively Jack lifted a hand to wipe the tears from Racer's face. Most of the others had already gone back to their own beds out of respect for Race's privacy, which meant that with as quietly as Jack had been speaking, it was still only the two of them, and maybe Smalls and Albert, who knew about Race's name. 

Again, out of instinct and not a small portion of love, Race's face cupped between his hands, Jack pressed a kiss to his forehead. It earned him a tentative, watery smile before Race involuntarily gave a huge yawn. 

"I'm tired," he said quietly, still seeming far younger than his almost seventeen years. Jack nodded. He'd been wide awake a few minutes before, but now exhaustion hit him like a runaway train. 

"You gonna be alright?" He asked, pulling Race up off the floor. 

Race shrugged again. "I don't want that to happen again," he admitted, refusing to meet Jack's eyes. 

"Shuddup, Racetrack." Albert smirked from where he leaned faux-casually against the bunk bed. "C'mere, you're sleepin' over here with me." He came closer, his eyes revealingly soft, and threw an arm around Race's shoulders, leading him back to his own claimed corner of the room. 

The bed would be a tight fit, but Jack felt a bit better knowing that Race'd be with Al. Albert usually seemed the tough guy, and most of the time he lived up to that impression. But when it came right down to it, he had the softest heart toward his friends. Race glanced at Jack one more time with another wobbly half-smile, probably in an attempt to reassure Jack that he would be alright. 

Jack climbed back up top and immediately met eyes with Crutchie, who was sitting up and watched as he clambered back to his spot. 

"Race alright?" 

Jack nodded. He picked at the already frayed edge of his thin blanket, which apparently Crutchie took as a cue to scoot closer. Neither of them said anything, but both knew how hard it was to see another of the boys hurting. It took a toll on Jack to have to see one of his kids, especially Race, like that. Crutchie offered what little comfort he could, pressing against Jack's side as he laid down and finally slowly fell asleep.

**Author's Note:**

> I've literally been waiting for like a week and a half to find a way to reference the "Antonio Rose Higgins" thing, because I saw someone mention it, i think it originally came from... the Wormsies discord, maybe? I'm not part of that so I don't really know lol, but I saw it mentioned and latched into it. XD 
> 
> I have no doubt that all the different casts are amazing, but I personally have only ever seen Livesies on Disney+ so I'm mostly basing this (especially Race) on that cast. 
> 
> Leave kudos and a comment if you want, I love chatting. :)


End file.
